Guy's Hot Chocolate Recipe

I just made some awesome hot chocolate. Here's how to make some of your own.

The ingredients are:
Land O'Lakes "Double Fudge" Hot Chocolate
Chocolate Chocolate Snowfairy Cocoa
2% milk (brand name OF YOUR CHOICE!!!)



STEP 1:
Ask your girlfriend how you're supposed to warm milk up. The answer is: the microwave.

STEP 2:
Ask your girlfriend, "How much do you think I should put in?" "Of what, the powder or the milk?" "The powder." "I'd put, like, half of it in at first and then warm it up, and then pour the rest in when it's hot." Do that.

STEP 3:
Pour milk in until it's about half way to the top or a little more. Check how much you should've put in, after putting it in. Try to remember conversion scales and figure out how many cups of milk would be in six ounces. Contemplate Googling this, on your phone. Decide against it and put a little more milk in. Microwave for 48 seconds.

STEP 4:
Take it out and taste it. Ask your girlfriend to taste it, because it tastes watered down. She will then instruct you to sprinkle the Fairysparkle super crappy no-name-brand bobo hot chocolate mix on top of the Land O' Lakes mix that you already have going.

STEP 5:
Ask her who got her the Friary cocoa mix and think, in your head, "I'll bet they hate you." Then she'll say she won it at work, which seems like a cooked-up story. Maybe not.

STEP 6:
Be careful when opening the Forest cocoa, because there is a tin of Skoal chewing tobacco on top of it. It will fall off.

STEP 7:
Pop the can of Pringles-like can of cocoa open and scoop. Put in two or three spoonfuls of it. Get the wire wisk martini strainer and give it to your girlfriend, for her to mix the stuff up.



STEP 8:
Microwave again, for 1 minute. Don't let the buzzer ring, though, open the door before it gets to zero.

STEP 9:
Your girlfriend will offer to whisk the drink again and you must accept the offer. She'll wisk it and then forget about it and let it sit there, this is important cool-down time.

STEP 10:
ENJOY! You've earned it.